And the award for Best Supporting Mother During A Hot Panamanian Parade goes to…. Allison Sherman! Allison’s thank-you speech is as follows:
I’d like to thank the academy for this amazing recognition of my performance today during Zoe’s 5th and final parade. But we all know I could not have done it alone. Here are just a few of the things that helped me get where I am today:
-the beach chair that held me when I could no longer stand in the hot sun. I’ll forever be in your debt
-the meat-on-a-stick guy who sold us yummy bits of protein when we needed it the most. I’ll never know what animal the meat came from but perhaps it’s better that way
-the pharmacy across the street for allowing us to pay 50 cents for the use of your bathroom. For 50 cents I would have thought we could choose which type of waste we required but we heeded your restriction of “only go #1”.
-Pedasi’s newest expat Ramona Roman for going along for the ride. You had no idea what you signed up for. It’s a good thing Pedasi has been boring lately otherwise you never would have agreed to go
-the fan, sponsored by Pepsi and the Senorita Of The Day With The Very Long Name. I wish I could say the fan allowed me to avoid sweating but no. It did take the edge off, however.
But I cannot leave the stage without registering my complaint with Tonosi Department of Parades. You tell me to be in your town at 8 a.m. which requires me to get up at 5:45 a.m. But then the parade starts at…. NOON? Really? Well now that’s just uncalled for. I demand a refund.
But all kidding aside… I gotta do a shout-out to the little Zoe-Zo. She was such a trooper during today’s and all the other parades. She got hot, sweaty, hungry, thirsty and tired but she didn’t complain and she smiled through it all. Twirl on, my little battoneer!